Philosophy of a Simple Mind

My friend was telling me how I would make a good Christian. I sort of laughed it off. I had at one time been religious. Until my mind snapped. Since than I had been searching for my true beliefs. I had bounced between religions, and collected some minor philosophic beliefs of every religion I had studied. These philosophic beliefs would debate and argue and clash with each other constantly. Even now I can not word it well, so my grammar may seem screwed up. I am not trying to not make sense, and I apologize for lack of concentration or visible path. If you just read with an open mind it should make somewhat sense. So anyways. We were, still are sorta, debating about the proof and disproof of religion. Which led me to explaining one of my philisophic beliefs.

That one, to truly understand something, must have doubt. For with doubt they can question themselves and look for new answers, therefore giving themself new knowledge and bettering themselves. I told him I could never be Christian because of the fact that it requires faith in God, the opposite of doubt, I told him I would forever doubt. I further went into explaining how even if Christianity was the one true religion I know for sure I am destined to be out of the norm. Like many people are. I am destined to explore my mind and truely find my being. My mind is always searching for answers. And I can only find answers by doubting what I previously hold in believe. Though this form of thinking has major drawbacks. I can not commit to anything, If I go out with a girl I start doubting i she really loves me, If I really even like her, if shes being honest, if she's cheating on me, if there is any future, if she will dump me gruesemly,etc. And these doubtings debate eachother 24/7. Though I rarely have a girlfriend. in fact never had in Arlington. I've had vacation girlfriend like things, but I dont doubt, since I know there is nothing to come of it. So there is no problem there. And again I can't commit to a religion, I can't even commit to a philosophic belief. Which is why it's so hard for me to type it out. I can't commit to the words I am typing. Though something Kevin had said had connected it, my thoguhts had flown outward and normal... It went like this... For I can not reword it. Here is the phiosophy I had told him.

And that is it basically on my philosophy of doubt.

I have theorized that there is a level of things below this, that not even the greatest, except maybe Jesus, have passed. Underneath the insight of destiny there is the insight of feelings. It is one thing to understand your own feelings. To know what each nervous twitch, buttefly flitter, and heart pounding means. But to know one elses just by watching there movements is something else altogether. Than below that is the insight of mind. Everyone knows what empathy is, to know how someone feels. This is a more advanced form of empathy in a sence, to know what or how someone thinks. To know what they think of someone else just by the slightest of slightest of body motions, how many times they blink, or what key there voice is when they talk to them. (Another theory in progress of mine is that everyone has a slight different voice depending on how much they like, or dislike, someone)Now some people may be thinking that they have had this happen before and its not anything special, but to be able to control all these the same way that they control there movement or breathing, that would truely be astonishing. Finally the farthest down and hardest level to break in the subconscious mind would be the insight of reality. The ability to alter what is real and hat is not. To with your free will change someones opinion of you, or their taste in music, their taste in clothing, etc. Obviously you dont just flick your wrist and bam they changed. Though you know just what to do, just what to say, just how to move in act to make the subtle subliminal effects take place.

I have not ran any too explicit tests... though I have ran a few on my friends without their knowledge... I can only guess on the last one, for so few people could get there. One in a hundred million maybe. Though it is very plausible to be the next thing below the previous. That is basically my theory of the power of the minds. And what all humans can do.